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Category ONE-OFFS

Sample #001

A gazelle looks at a lineup of predators and says, "All of them." — The Lineup

A man wonders if having a shark as a lifeguard isn't a conflict of interest. — Is it just me?

One judge admits to another judge that he just guesses on the really tough cases. — Justice

A man responds to a settlement offer by photocopying his naked butt. — Counter Offer

A caveman draws on a cave wall while his wife tells him to "Tell, don't show." — Lit Crit

A bird shits on Alfred Hitchcock in the same year that he releases his movie "The Birds." — Hitchcock, 1963

A man believes that his wealth gives him the moral high ground. — High Ground

A man with an enormous butt is titled 'Grown Ass Man'. — Grown Man

A recorded message tells a man who is on hold to wait for the next recorded apology. — Please Hold

A cowboy takes offense to having his grammar corrected by his friend. — Split Infinitive

After making a large political donation, a wealthy man gets a favor from a corrupt politician. — Thanks, Senator

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© Tim O’Brien - 2025